Ted and his wife were working in their garden one day when Ted looks over at his wife and says, “Your butt is getting really big, I mean, really big! I bet your butt is bigger than the barbecue.”

With that, he proceeded to get a measuring tape and measure the grill. Then, he went over to where his wife was working and measured his wife’s bottom.

“Yes, I was right, your butt is two inches wider than the barbecue!” The wife chose to ignore her husband.

Later that night in bed, Ted is feeling a little frisky. He makes some advances towards his wife, who completely brushes him off.

“What’s wrong?” he asks. She answers, “Do you really think I’m going to fire up this big-a** grill for one little weenie?”