I’m Ingrid, and my world pretty much revolves around my daughter, Anna. I raised her by myself, putting in double shifts at a diner, where I still work, but as a manager now.
My pregnancy wasn’t planned, and when it became clear that I would be raising her as a single mother, I knew one thing: she would never miss out or want for anything.
I succeeded at that, but I did even more. Anna and I formed a bond even closer than some mothers and daughters. I like to think of us as Lorelai and Rory from “Gilmore Girls,” although there was never really “man drama.”
Her one relationship was with Jason, and I loved him. He was caring, sweet, and funny. Soon, they got married and moved away to the city. It was 3 hours away, which wasn’t the best for me, but this was her life.
At first, we talked every day, and I gushed about her exciting new adventures. But around two years later, our conversations got shorter and different.
She’d sound distant, say she was “busy,” and I could tell there was something she wasn’t telling me. It hurt, and I kept overthinking it. Was this normal, or was I losing her?
Other moms may have been fine and moved on, but I couldn’t take it after a while. I decided I was going to visit her and find out what was really going on.
So, two weeks ago, I got up early, baked her favorite cinnamon buns, and took a train to her city. I imagined her face lighting up when she saw me. But when I got to her apartment and knocked, what happened next was the last thing I expected.
The door cracked open, and Anna peered out. Her eyes went wide, but it wasn’t with happiness. She slipped out as if she were hiding something behind her and closed the door.
“Mom? What are you doing here?” she whispered, but her tone was almost… mad?
I held up the basket of buns and smiled. “I wanted to see you! I brought your favorite buns,” I said with too much cheer.
Her eyes darted nervously down the hallway. “You can’t be here,” she said, shaking her head. “Mom, just… go.”
My heart dropped, but I tried to stay calm. “Anna, what’s going on? Is Jason—”
“Mom, I said GO!” she snapped, her voice changing from a whisper to sharp demand, and for the first time, she looked me in the eyes. I could see something there. Fear? But before I could respond, she turned and slammed the door.
I stood there, frozen, clutching the basket. My daughter had just shut her door in my face. All manner of terrible things went through my mind. Was it Jason? Was their relationship not as I thought?
Was my daughter afraid of her husband? God, how could I have missed such a thing? Well… not anymore! I wasn’t leaving, but I knew knocking again would be fruitless.
So, I moved away from her door and tucked myself around the corner of the hallway, out of sight.
Hours passed, and I couldn’t think of anything but what my daughter might be going through at the hands of her husband. Why hadn’t she said anything? She had been so afraid to even open the door.
Wait, was he inside, or was he out? Not knowing was torture. After what felt like an eternity, her door finally creaked open, and I shrank back into my little corner.
Anna stepped out, looking around nervously like before. I could see that her face was much paler. Her eyes were red and puffy like she’d been crying. My stomach churned.
She called the elevator, and once it closed, I rushed to her apartment. I didn’t know what I was planning, but lucky for me, my daughter had left her front door unlocked. I slipped inside quickly.
If Jason was there, I would give him a piece of my mind, and I took my phone out of my pocket, just in case I needed to call 911 urgently. But I took a look at Anna’s apartment and wrinkled my nose.
The place was a disaster. Clothes were scattered everywhere. Dishes were piled up in the sink and on almost every surface. But some of those dishes and clothes gave me pause. They were small. I frowned, walking further inside, and suddenly, I stopped in my tracks.
There was a crib in the living room.
I wanted to move, but my feet wouldn’t listen to me. My daughter had a baby and never told me about it! I felt like dying. I blinked furiously as if this were some kind of dream.
Before I could do anything else, I heard footsteps behind me. I barely had time to turn before Anna walked back in. She froze by the door after seeing me, but after a moment, her shoulders sagged, resigned.
“Mom…” she whispered thickly.
“Anna… you have a baby?” I managed to get out. If I spoke any louder, my emotions would pour out, and I would go into a full-blown scene.
She looked down, and I could see the shame creeping over her. She nodded slowly. “I didn’t know how to tell you.”
“Tell me you’d become a mother, which is the single most important thing you can do with your life?” I asked, dangerously close to going into hysterics. Then, I glanced between her and the crib. “Where’s Jason? Is he hurting you? The baby? Is that why you were afraid?”
She let out a whoosh of breath and shook her head. “Hurting me? No, Mom. You’ve got it all wrong,” Anna began, wiping her hair from her forehead and putting down some mail.
That’s why she left and returned so suddenly.
“He’s gone. He left when I told him the baby wasn’t his. I was only afraid you’d found out about this.”
“What?” I asked, even more shocked, but my daughter jumped, and I lowered my voice. “Anna, I’m so confused. Please, tell me what happened.”
Her mouth twisted, and I knew that was guilt and shame. “I made a terrible mistake, Mom. With my boss. I thought he would give me more than what Jason and I had, and I ruined everything.”
Her boss.
“Okay…”
“I asked him to leave his wife, and he said no and laughed in my face,” Anna revealed, hanging her head. “He fired me, too, and then, I found out I was pregnant.”
I kept quiet only because I wanted to hear the entire thing now. But each word was more shocking than the next.
“When I found out I was pregnant, I thought it could be Jason’s,” she continued and shrugged a little. “But once the baby was born, the difference was clear.”
She pointed towards the crib, and I finally got closer. Yes, the baby was a completely different race than Jason.
“He was so hurt,” Anna continued, starting to sniffle. “I begged him for forgiveness, but he wouldn’t budge.”
“Anna, you should’ve told me all of this as soon as it happened,” I said slowly.
“I know, but I thought I could handle it on my own. I didn’t want you to see this. You worked so hard, sacrificed so much so I could have a better life and look at me now. I ended up in a mess even worse than anything you went through. I didn’t want you to feel like everything you did was for nothing.”
“Oh, sweetheart,” I whispered, pulling her into a hug before she could back away. “Listen to me. I didn’t work all those long hours, skip meals, and pour everything into raising you just to have you shut me out now. I did it because I love you. And I’d do it all over again, no matter where life takes you.”
She finally broke down, and her tears wet my sweater. “I thought I could fix everything on my own, that I didn’t need to burden you. But it’s been so hard, Mom. Every day, I’ve been barely holding it together.”
“Well, Mama’s here now,” I assured her, smoothing back her hair. “You don’t have to do this alone. I’m here for you. I’m here for both of you.”
“Her name is Stella,” Anna confessed between her cries.
My grandchild, Stella.
After we separated, I told Anna I was staying with her for a while, and she was so thankful. I’m still here, two weeks later.
I didn’t think my daughter would ever be a single mother, but some blessings don’t seem so until hindsight. All babies are a gift.
In any case, though, Anna had an advantage I didn’t. She was the result of a one-night stand. Stella came from an affair, meaning a superior at a company abused his power and compromised my daughter.
I was not going to let it slide. I’ve already called a lawyer. I have some money saved and found her ex-boss’s wife’s Facebook.
I guess we do have a lot of “man drama” now. It’s just not “Gilmore Girls.”